July 21

In less than a week we’ll be celebrating Belgium National Day and for the second year in a row, wohoho, we don’t have a Government. But what the hell, we have bought Budweiser, who cares.

Belgium breaks its own record

Yesterday I read that Belgium has just broken its own record without Government: 149 days (and counting). That means we’ve been living five months in a perfectly functional country –at least the metro is punctual every morning– that needs no Government!

Photo by lapuce.wordpress.comThis is a serious problem. Look, I love demonstrations, however, against whom do we demonstrate now? It’d be stupid to complain about an interim Office that has already lost the elections… I don’t know why the anarchists aren’t in the streets telling everybody this is the proof we don’t need a damn system (well, maybe that three guys are already there but I haven’t seen them).

What’s the solution to the problem? It’s an easy one. The north of Belgium automatically annexed to The Netherlands (and that small bunch of people speaking German, well, to Germany). The south can be bought by France (sorry, Dutchies don’t have enough money to buy Flanders). The problem is Brussels. I’d give it back to Spain, honestly, it’s really better than selling it (although probably Luxembourg and Monaco are willing to do it).

Oh, wait, there’s a better solution. We can divide Brussels between Wallonia and Flanders. How? We can do what they did when separating the library of the Catholic University of Leuven into the Université catholique de Louvain and the Katholieke Universiteit Leuven (yes, this is true). Those books with an odd-numbered shelfmark stayed in Leuven, while the even-numbered ones moved to Louvain-la-Neuve. Therefore, streets with a Döner Kebab go to France, the rest to The Netherlands. Fair enough, right?

OK, too much coffee today.

Update: Ops, things are getting worse: Belgian crisis deepens after collapse of coalition talks :-(